Have you had problems in your relationships for a while now? Do you often find yourself trying to satisfy others? Do you have difficulty in trying to understand or fulfil the needs of others? Then you are at the right place! Read about relationships and management of relationships below.
Relationships are not one-stop-all for everyone. Not every relationship you enter into is going to be unconditional and understanding. A few are going to be conditional, a few situational and a few are just for a mere while. In this whole web of complications, we tend to forget the essentials for any of these to work without affecting our peace of mind. There are a few relations in our life span that we can expect to be selfless and unconditional, but the main one of all these is going to be having a healthy relationship with yourself, which includes not being self-critical, allowing yourself to make mistakes and learning from them, loving and respecting yourself. After learning a little more about yourself, you move on to working things with others. Let’s understand what we can do to have a healthy relationship with others.
Listen to what is being communicated.
As important as speaking up in a relationship is so is being able to listen to others. Listening allows us to understand what the other person is trying to communicate and makes the other person feel respected and loved. There are always going to be different points of views, but to put out your thoughts you need to let others explain their opinions first.
Self-love is not a concept, it is a necessity.
Self-love may look selfish to some people, but this concept is often misunderstood and misinterpreted. You don’t need to be entitled, that is not why self-love is. Self-love is not tolerating disrespect, it is standing up for yourself, giving yourself a break and most importantly it is understanding what you and your body need and doing it without feeling guilty or sorry. We may think at times that how can we love others when we are so caught up with ourselves? But, what we need to understand is to love anyone else we need to first start with ourselves. If you can’t love yourself enough, nothing could ever satisfy you.
Developing boundaries doesn’t mean breaking a relation.
There are going to be a few things you don’t want to share with someone, maybe your parent, sibling, friend or even spouse. To have that comfort to speak up about what’s bothering you will let you open up about your feelings and express what you need from another person is up to you. The same applies when someone else is trying to establish a boundary with you. You need to be able to understand that another person establishing certain boundaries should be respected as well.
Being considerate and happy for each other’s success.
There might be times when your spouse or friend achieves something better than you, be it getting paid more, getting promoted, having started something new or even going somewhere new. These things may sometimes seem very minimal but the effect they leave on relationships when feelings are not expressed properly they find a way towards damaging relationships. You may not feel joyful or happy for what your partner or friend or sibling have achieved but you have no right to make anyone feel that they shouldn’t be able to enjoy it. And if you have someone in your life who makes you feel this way, it is better to address the issue than pushing it under the carpet.
Expect realistic things from your partner.
No one can be what you want them to be, every person is different in their own way and it is absolutely necessary to accept them for what they are. It is essential to understand that just because we see black doesn’t mean the other person can’t see white. A relation sometimes has to be you both accepting that it might be grey. Our expectations have a tendency to sometimes overshadow the beauty of what’s present. We fall into the trap of these expectations and don’t realise that what we initially fell in love with is what you have, by trying to change it into something that wasn’t there before, you may change what it is in the present.
Be that person, they can depend on.
Be a person that people can rely on upon without having a fear of being judged. And find a person who you can rely on without constant fear of judgement. Yes, it goes both ways. If you fear what the person is going to say in a situation more than finding a solution, you may have to re-evaluate the relationship. Yes, there are a few times where you need to own up to it and clear your mistakes. But, it’s important to have someone that can stand by and support you while you are doing right by the wrongs.
Problems in relationships need to be addressed, not fought.
Every relation has its own set of problems and issues. Often when arguing about what the problem is in a relationship, we tend to forget that the problem is not the person, it is the situation and the cause. Don’t get stuck with the person being a problem, they are not. Their actions might be, but you need to be able to sit down and have a talk about that. The conversation needs to be specific and explain enough of what you want out of it. Instead of it being a blame game, form an understanding and address the issue.
Having a balance.
Just because you are in a relationship, doesn’t mean it defines your entire life and time. It is necessary to be able to plan an outing or an evening away with someone else without the fear of it creating a conflict. Such a balance is often required to have a healthy relationship.
The points mentioned above are thoughts on how you could maintain a healthy relationship. As difficult as it may seem, being open and understanding are the vital aspects of having great mental and physical health. You don’t always have to sit down and talk to your partner only when you have an issue. Communication through ups and downs is the right way to go. After reading this go out there and do something for your loved ones, as it’s the thought that matters. Plan a special night, get dressed, indulge in some food and look at relations in your life with a fresh perspective.
Let’s glow and grow together 🙂