A term that we have possibly heard many times. Many of us might have faced it in different ways. At times it would have bothered us a lot and at other times we would have been indifferent to it possibly because we were tired of it or couldn’t take it anymore.
Be it for any reason, be it your friend or foe, husband or brother or anybody else. Bullying is just not acceptable. Now, there are different definitions people set for this. Some say that it is okay to joke around someone if it is a friend, some find joy in making fun of a person because he/she does not respond to it. However, in the dictionary of humanity and no order of words, bullying is bothering someone to the extent that they tend to dislike the situation or even feel humiliated at times.
Everybody’s sensitivities are different, some are strong by nature and some are simply sensitive about what people tell them. As humans, we all need to remember that, bothering someone emotionally and especially because they don’t revert is an unhealthy habit and should be taken seriously.
Here are a few ways to recognise bullying and respond to it and fight it back.
Speak up: The moment you know what someone is telling you is not right and bothers you, you speak up. Be calm about it, often bursting out makes things painful, instead gather your strength and speak up. If you know the people who are bothering you with their jokes and making fun of you, then speak to them, if they care, they’ll surely stop it. If a stranger or someone you don’t know much is attempting to make you feel bad, then do not think twice about firmly telling them on their face that what they are doing is not at all right. Being firm and speaking would be your first + step towards fighting a bully.
Say No!: It is often the two-letter magic word ‘NO’ for people to understand. It has a strong impact. So if a friend decides to make fun of you when you’re in a group or if a colleague makes fun of your opinion in a meeting then you have to say no and fight for yourself. If you do not do that you can expect more people to make fun of you, just because you do not respond and stand for yourself.
Do not entertain this at any cost: Many times, the naive and innocent person in us might tell us that “it is okay, they’re my friends, after all, they are with me otherwise” doesn’t matter if someone’s a friend or a foe, it only matters that they are hurting you despite knowing that it bothers you. If you entertain such behaviour, it is guaranteed that those people will not respect you. Your respect is your right and your responsibility. You have to safeguard it. Please make up your mind and walk out of these friendships and relationships that tend to bother you for no mistake of yours. Letting others bully you is a mistake you commit.
Stand up for yourself: Stand up for yourself and others. If you know it is wrong to speak and let people know that it is unacceptable to laugh at someone’s expense. Bullying is undoubtedly painful for people who regularly face it, therefore, make your effort and stand up for them. Motivate them to speak and fight for their self-respect. Your help might prove to be a blessing for someone. For all you know, this might garner more support and might embarrass the person who is relentlessly bullying.
The rule is the same: A trick here for people to stop bullying you. Show them the mirror, tell them to think and answer how they would feel if the same things you are put through happens with them. Most of them will understand and might realize where they have faltered. The rule should be fair for everyone. This helps people solve the issue.
Types: People are of different types, some are very nice and pleasant when they speak to you individually, but when in the group they find it entertaining to make fun of you. Some keep constantly bothering you over possibly everything you do but might pretend to be very affectionate in front of others. However, it is your responsibility to understand that it has to stop irrespective of how close they are to you.
Why do they do this?: Most people when confronted about them bullying others reject it telling that it is all in good humour. They will never take responsibility for the fact that someone is upset because of them. There is no exact answer to why they do this. But, it could be because they find it entertaining. However, they should be told and counselled about the same. If they change then great, if not, then you need new friends and new people.
Prioritize yourself: Always remember that no matter what, your dignity is your priority, never be comfortable with people taking advantage of your humility and good nature. If bullying is a crime, then, getting bullied is equally bad. Some people might threaten to end a relationship and make